Will we ever know it all?!


After several years working in the acute setting, I was offered the chance to go back to university and study critical care. I jumped at the chance as getting my teeth into something as complex as critical and emergency care is something I love.

Assessment for this course is an assignment where you have to unpick a critical incident you have been a part of and delve into the whys? and what ifs? looking at investigation results and determining why they were relevant. Now never the one to go for the easy option, I chose what seemed like a straight forward resus at the time however now I’m unpicking it bit by bit and questioning not only my own actions at the time to determine whether this was in actual fact ‘best practice’ but questioning the decisions made by medical staff and comparing that against policies and protocols from all over the UK.

If you are from a medical background reading this, you will know exactly how refection can make you feel. Im not generally the type to sit and dwell on the day I had or bring my work home with me but sometimes those children who need just that bit extra slip through and my emotion comes home with me. When it comes to reflection though, you can’t help but doubt what you did and second guess everything, even when the outcome was favourable. Unpicking this critical incident left me thinking ‘what if?’

What if I hadn’t gone into the room when I had?

What if the doctor on call hadn’t listened to my concerns?

What if she hadn’t had the operation she needed to save her life?

I have spent the best part of my day researching into every aspect of this Childs clinical diagnosis and it has become very clear that even after 6 years of working in paediatrics, I have only just scratched the surface on paediatric medicine and knowledge. I don’t think anyone will ever know it all and we have to learn from each other. We have to pick each other up when we have our down, self doubting days in practice and remember that we do the very best we can for our patients.



Numero Uno

For those of you who are wondering who I am, I am a 24 year old practicing paediatric staff nurse based in South Yorkshire. I have been qualified for 3 years and absolutely love my job. As the saying goes – “Find a job you love and you’ll never work a day in your life”.

I have toyed with the idea of writing a blog for some time now, but never really found the time of the inspiration to do so but here I am, I have finally bitten the bullet.

Now, this blog will not be everyones cup of tea and I’m ok with that. Some things you will enjoy reading, and others you most definitely won’t. My aim is for it to be mostly centred around the job I do and how I cope emotionally and physically with day to day life caring for acutely sick children but I’m hoping it won’t be all doom and gloom. I aim to include other aspects of my life including my love of horses and the gym.

Ironically, I’m sat up writing this post when I should actually be preparing myself for a 13 hours shift tomorrow but hey, there you have it – My first blog post.

Feel free to comment on any things you would like to see included in the blog, or anything you would like me to talk about.